In the beginning when you had an argument you simply ignored the family or bad mouthed them at weddings.
If you wanted to really make an issue out of things you took the argument out on to the street…there were broom handles, two shalwar kameez fellows with the buttons missing at the front and maybe some old woman screeching, ‘Hai main mar gayee’ at the top of the voice.
It was not just a punga (argument) – it was an occasion.
Let’s be completely honest for a moment – we Asians have been genetically engineered to get into an argument for no reason whatsoever. We have within us what is called the ‘punga gene’.
Best of all we like to do it in public.
We not only like the punga but we revel in a punga. In fact we are so used to a punga we have become almost immune to the whole thing.
So, when there is a kick-off we aren’t even surprised. Put a couple of Asians in the same room and attitude will soon take over.
Whilst we all know that Asian men have ego issues - most pungays on the planet have started because one woman didn’t like the other.
Maybe it was hair or the outfit...or the way she was acting.
Brother Asian is best used and abused when he is used and abused by sister Asian.
Now, technology has ensured we are forever finding new ways to exact revenge.
The problem is the new style pungas have become these long drawn out pointless affairs.
The whole process has become so cumbersome that the punga may well have lost it's zest.
But they are clear examples of how the Asian Punga gene has evolved itself. First there was a Facebook Punga where two groups would take sides and their army of equally vulgar self-obsessed ‘friends’ would do the fighting for them.
One 'sister' would have a pop at another 'sister' and all the ****** come out to play.
In recent years though we have been faced with the WhatsApp Punga.
You create a group and two people don’t like one another. Soon enough there is a disagreement and one person leaves the group only to be forced back on by other members.
Before then a whole load of WhatsApp messages have been sent. It gets so serious that one person calls the other person.
For a while, all parties are treading on egg shells in case the two acquaintances kick-off.
But do you know who the worst people are?
It is those slimy creatures who keep stoking the punga fire by pretending to be friends with both parties.
These guys pretend to be peace-makers because they know that a punga is good for their own credibility.
If life has taught us one thing it is these m***** ****** you need to watch out for.
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